If you are going through the painful experience of losing a spouse, it can feel like there is no way to heal. You might find yourself wondering how you will ever find happiness again. However, rest assured that there are some straightforward things you can do to help yourself move forward and feel better after the loss of your spouse.
Be Patient With Yourself
The grieving process is different for everyone, and there is no right or wrong way to feel about the loss of your spouse. It’s important to remember that you are not “ready” to move on until you are ready to do so, even if others feel differently about it (and they will). You will know when the time comes because there won’t be any doubt in your mind—you’ll just know. You should never feel guilty about how you feel.
Find A Support System
You might be surprised to find out that the best support system is one you probably already have and can use. That’s right! Friends, family, and even acquaintances are a great place to start. If you don’t know anyone who has experienced what you’re going through, reach out to them anyway. Don’t be afraid of being judged or rejected because they might not know how to help you either.
A support system can include:
- Talking to friends and family
- Finding a therapist
- Seeking help from religious leaders
- Participating in grief support groups or individually-assigned therapists
Talk About Your Feelings
You don’t have to talk about your feelings with anyone if you don’t want to. However, if you do decide that talking about your spouse is something that would help heal the pain of the loss, there are many options available. You can talk with a friend or family member who knows what it’s like losing a spouse and is willing to listen. Or you can visit with a therapist or clergyman who will be able to lend an ear and provide valuable advice regarding grieving processes.
If these options aren’t working for you, finding someone specializing in grief counseling might be best. Many people find it easier to tell their stories and have someone else listen because they know that person won’t judge them or tell them how they should feel after their spouse has died.
Avoid The Urge To Make Major Decisions
The urge to make significant decisions comes and goes when you’re grieving. Be patient with yourself and try to let the urge pass by itself if possible. If you feel it’s necessary to make a significant decision, take your time and get as much information as possible before making your final call.
Feel Free To Seek Professional Help
For some, therapy is the best way to grieve. The healing process is a long one, and you may find yourself struggling with feelings of guilt and anger for many years to come. A therapist can help you work through these emotions in a safe place so that they don’t interfere with your future happiness.
For others, traditional counseling isn’t the right choice for them. Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is highly recommended by many mental health professionals as an alternative approach if it works better for you than classic talk therapy does.
Taking Care Of Yourself Is The Best Way To Move Forward.
Taking care of yourself is the best way to move forward. You may be surprised at how much energy you have when you stop focusing on other people and start focusing on yourself. It’s not selfish or self-centered; it’s just what we all need!
Self-care is essential because it helps us feel better physically, emotionally, and mentally. Self-care also helps us develop internal resources that help us cope with stressors in our lives, such as grief after the loss of a spouse.